On this glorious day, absolutely nothing important has or will ever happen. No emperor’s died, no civilizations trembled, nothing.
And you will destroy anyone who tells you otherwise, that I command, and my commands are the ultimate law.
Now, as we walk down the long roads of life, I would like to direct your attention to the weird guy walked right next to you. No, the left side of you, not the right, much better.
Now, as we move through the streets of chaos and delight, we would see the magnificent end of all Romans, however, seeing as no such thing exist, we will have to live with just the rather boring and insignificant end of all people named Herman.
Which in itself is properly quite entertaining, but ultimately rather lame. Now as for this week in music?
I disagree.
Onwards, forwards, backwards.
As for now, we shall instead discuss the effects of nuclear explosives on ninjas posers. The effect will of course be the same as the effect of large scale earthquakes on Chinese porcelain shops.
Disastrous. And really funny to watch, we must not forget the entertainment value of destruction.
Moving on, we shall now cover the amazing life of Gerhard James Henry Wilhelmsbyrhgenstein Von Derblödefeldt.
Who died 21 minutes after her birth? And had absolutely no effect on humanity and history as a whole.
Always remember that students, your lives are ultimately utterly and totally fruitless, and will end in nothing but your complete and utter death.
And what of the afterlife you may ask? Did I say May? I meant, you must ask!
The afterlife is generally pretty dull, we die, we go to some retarded place our equally stupid religions say, and be happy or miserable for the rest of eternity.
At least, that’s what the MAN want you to think, in reality we are recycled and turned into new stars.
And the end of the Universe will never happened due to our sacrifice.
Glorifica!
Indeed we must be happy about our lot in life, as a fact, most of you will be complete and utter failures. Quite a few of you are already failures.
Keep up the horrible work you lazy bastards.
RagnarokZ.